man...I love bad jokes....as if this site's not enough of a bad joke on it's own...
Two antennas meet on a roof, fall in love and get married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.
Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, "I've lost my electron." The other says, "Are you sure?" The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive..."
A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything."
Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted.
A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says: "A beer please, and one for the road."
A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet and says, "My dog's cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?" "Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him." So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth. Finally, he says, "I'm going to have to put him down." "What? Because he's cross-eyed?" "No, because he's really heavy."
I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.
So a pirate walks into a bar, and teh bartender says, "you know, you've got a steering wheel attached to your crotch." So the pirate says, "YARRRR, IT'S DRIVIN' ME NUTS!"
Posted by: piratebot at January 13, 2005 03:24 PMa polar bear walks into a bar and says to the bartender," I'll have a.................beer." Bartender says, "no problem, but why the big pause?"
horse walks into a bar, bartender says, "why the long face?"
three string are outside a bar. first string goes in to get a beer and is told my the bartender that he "won't serve their kind in here". second string goes in and is told the same thing. third string pulls his ends apart and ties himself into a half hitch. as he walks in the bartender ask, "hey! aren't you that string i just told to get out of here?!"
"no, I'm a frayed knot."
Bear walks up to a bar and eats a woman sitting on one of the barstools. Then he turns to the bartender and orders a beer. Bartender says, "we don't allow drugs in here." Bear says, "but I don't do drugs."
Bartender says, "what about that bar bitch you ate?"
Posted by: Jess at January 14, 2005 03:12 PM